Sep. 13, 2010 at 7:49am
Resident Evil 4: After We Stopped CaringQuick recap and then the review begins. There are zombies. Lots of them. They’ve taken over the world. There are very few humans left. And some of the humans that are still there are from the Umbrella Corporation. They’re bad guys.That’s honestly all you need to know. Oh… and that there is a clone army of Milla Jovovich. And it’s the Matrix.  Actually, the movie takes the worst parts of the second and third Matrix installments.This is what bothers me. I genuinely enjoyed the first two, and could even find good things in the third. But this one. This one was kind of… crazy. While I do not hold a grudge against a clone army of Milla Jovovich, in fact, I might choose to celebrate this part of the movie the most, I found this movie moved too much like some of the crazier Japanese games. This is great if you like Japanese games, but the general movie-going audience would be confused by not only the strange shifts in reality but also the concepts of accepting weird things happening without explanation. A super huge, nearly unbeatable hammer man, gamers would know as The Exectuioner, is pretty much just thrown into the movie without explanation. In the video games, you don’t need logic to throw a boss in, but in a movie, they need to be fleshed out if nothing more than saying, this is this guy, he is here now, now he is dead.In the first 45 minutes, they kill about 5 zombies. This is a zombie film. I came to see rotten flesh explode. The even more annoying thing is that this is the the fourth movie. They don’t have to set up that there are zombies. We know. They don’t have to establish the main character. We’ve already met her. We don’t need to find out why she’s an extreme badass with the use of a thousand of weapons. We’ve seen her slay thousands with a rusty pipe and a bazooka. GET TO THE KILLING!Another very weird thing is the casting. Mostly alright save for really just one guy. One of the plot points is they are in a prison, and have to figure out how to get out of the prison. Guess who has the only way of doing that. Wentworth Miller. I’m sure not many people know who that is just by name but I’ll tell you show he stars in. Prison Break. The man who is going to get them out of a prison, made his fortune… getting people out of prisons. Typecast much?But in reality, the worst and best part of this movie is the cinematography. The good news, it was filmed entirely in 3D from the start, so there is no half assed attempt to redo it in 3D rendering the whole thing a blurry mess. The 3D looked amazing. It worked out so well, things blowing up out of the screen and things flying out at the audience were exactly what 3D was meant to do. It was great. Sadly, while the whole movie was shot in 3D, it also felt like 80% of it was shot in slow-motion. For an hour and a half long movie, the movie felt like three hours, and not the good kind of three hours. There are only so many times I can see people dramatically flicking their hair to face an offscreen foe as they definitely lift their shotgun up and fire off a couple of rounds in a cool echoey kind of fashion. It’s honestly just a rehashing without many good things added to the series. Which is sad. I like zombies. I like hot women blowing up zombies. I like hot women blowing up zombies with huge guns that shoot quarters. I like all these things, but they could not save this movie. 2.5 crazy toothed inside out dogs out of 5

Resident Evil 4: After We Stopped Caring

Quick recap and then the review begins. There are zombies. Lots of them. They’ve taken over the world. There are very few humans left. And some of the humans that are still there are from the Umbrella Corporation. They’re bad guys.
That’s honestly all you need to know. Oh… and that there is a clone army of Milla Jovovich. And it’s the Matrix.  Actually, the movie takes the worst parts of the second and third Matrix installments.
This is what bothers me. I genuinely enjoyed the first two, and could even find good things in the third. But this one. This one was kind of… crazy. While I do not hold a grudge against a clone army of Milla Jovovich, in fact, I might choose to celebrate this part of the movie the most, I found this movie moved too much like some of the crazier Japanese games. This is great if you like Japanese games, but the general movie-going audience would be confused by not only the strange shifts in reality but also the concepts of accepting weird things happening without explanation. A super huge, nearly unbeatable hammer man, gamers would know as The Exectuioner, is pretty much just thrown into the movie without explanation. In the video games, you don’t need logic to throw a boss in, but in a movie, they need to be fleshed out if nothing more than saying, this is this guy, he is here now, now he is dead.
In the first 45 minutes, they kill about 5 zombies. This is a zombie film. I came to see rotten flesh explode. The even more annoying thing is that this is the the fourth movie. They don’t have to set up that there are zombies. We know. They don’t have to establish the main character. We’ve already met her. We don’t need to find out why she’s an extreme badass with the use of a thousand of weapons. We’ve seen her slay thousands with a rusty pipe and a bazooka. GET TO THE KILLING!
Another very weird thing is the casting. Mostly alright save for really just one guy. One of the plot points is they are in a prison, and have to figure out how to get out of the prison. Guess who has the only way of doing that. Wentworth Miller. I’m sure not many people know who that is just by name but I’ll tell you show he stars in. Prison Break. The man who is going to get them out of a prison, made his fortune… getting people out of prisons. Typecast much?
But in reality, the worst and best part of this movie is the cinematography. The good news, it was filmed entirely in 3D from the start, so there is no half assed attempt to redo it in 3D rendering the whole thing a blurry mess. The 3D looked amazing. It worked out so well, things blowing up out of the screen and things flying out at the audience were exactly what 3D was meant to do. It was great. Sadly, while the whole movie was shot in 3D, it also felt like 80% of it was shot in slow-motion. For an hour and a half long movie, the movie felt like three hours, and not the good kind of three hours. There are only so many times I can see people dramatically flicking their hair to face an offscreen foe as they definitely lift their shotgun up and fire off a couple of rounds in a cool echoey kind of fashion. It’s honestly just a rehashing without many good things added to the series. Which is sad. I like zombies. I like hot women blowing up zombies. I like hot women blowing up zombies with huge guns that shoot quarters. I like all these things, but they could not save this movie. 2.5 crazy toothed inside out dogs out of 5